     My heart stopped. "What?"
     
     "She is his daughter."

     I knew I shouldn't have gotten out of bed this morning.




-------------------------

     Imrpfofanfic presents:

     Magical Girl Hunters: 

     Part 38: Dysfunctional Family Feud

          by Nate D.

     Series created by Aaron Shattuck.
-------------------------

     It took me a few seconds to digest the information
Ramsbottom had just given me. As a whole, Kaneko had all the
reason in the world to want to kill me. I had helped her father
unwillingly F*** off to another dimension. Not to mention the
fact I helped make her mother an unsightly burn on someone else's
carpet. Super-heroes and serial killers were born from less crap
than that.

      I rested my chin on my hand. "Ramsbottom, you certainly
know how to bring happiness to a person's life, you know that?"
      
      "Terribly sorry to be the bearer of bad news, old chap. If
I hadn't told you, you might have found out a tad more
unpleasantly."

     I thought about that for a second. "Yeah, you're right. I'd
probably have found out with her standing over my broken body. At
least now I know what I'm dealing with. Alright, I'm through
interrogating, what do you want to know from me?"

      "Hrm. Not much, only a few questions regarding an
acquaintance of yours. A Mr. Devonshire."

     Wonderful. "I'll bite. What the hell do you want to know
about that asshole?"

     "Only something simple. I need to know his telephone number.
I'd like to hire him to kill something that has been dogging my
heels lately. Ask no questions about it, Yoi, you'll get lies as
an answer. Just give me the chap's number if you have it."

     "Veracity?"
      My secretary handed Ramsbottom a piece of paper with a
number on it before I finished saying the last syllable of her
name. It was times like these I was happy Veracity remembered
damn near everything. "That gonna be all, Ramsbottom?"

      "Quite. Cheerio, old chap."

      As soon as he said 'cheerio' I almost shot him, but he
disappeared as soon as he said his good-byes. I banged my head
against my desk a few more times. 

      "Yoi, Itami and I are going to his apartment to redecorate.
If you need us, call...Ja."

      I watched as the two of them left. Redecorate. Right.
"Veracity? Do me a favor. Get in contact with Kyo and Mai. Tell
them that if they don't get their asses in my office by 5:00, I
will personally drag them out of the great above myself. Tell
them I don't care how they do it, just to get it done."

     She nodded to me as I walked back into my office. I decided
I might as well trust Veracity. She had been one of the few plus
sides to recent events. I thought about my situation for a few
minutes. Kaneko didn't seem to care that I killed her parents.
But she did seem conniving. And if I understood her hints right,
she had enlisted the help of my
once-personality-fragment-now-Ramsbottom Koi. Which only
furthered my misery. I would need an edge...Something. 

     It was about then an entire lamp fixture appeared above my
head. Meaning I got an idea. I busted a pad of paper and a pen
from my cluttered desk and began to write.

     A few minutes later, Veracity opened the door. "Someone here
to see you."

     "Is it a job?" 

     "I believe so."
     
     "G'head and send 'em my way."

     What walked in my door I wasn't expecting. Lovely Lieutenant
Diesel walked in, sat down, poured a line of cocaine onto my
desk, and proceeded to inhale through her nostrils it with a
crazy straw. I blinked.

      "Can I help you?" I was pleasant about it. My gun was in my
desk drawer, and despite her size and age, she looked like she
could break my arm by looking at me.

     She spoke after rubbing her nose a few times. "Uh, yeah. I
need ya to kill my sister, an' then kill me, if y'could. Ya get
your money after we're both dead."
      "Can I kill you now?"

     "Nah, I wanna see my sister capped first. Her name's Lovely
Captain Brutus. Ya kill her, kill me, an' I'll pay double."

     "How would you pay me if you're dead?" Seemed another
hopeless job to me, but I continued to be professional.

     "I die, and there'll be an account number in the pocket of
my human form. The money'll be in the account."

     I wasn't in a mood to argue. I'd deal with this problem
later. "Deal. Give my sister any information on your sister that
you have."

     We shook hands, and both exited the office. Veracity calmly
had her take a seat. I thought about something, and pulled out
the pad of paper from my trench coat.

     "Veracity, I'm going to Murray's. Take messages, or
whatever. Kyo and Mai had better be here when I get back."

------------------------

     "You want WHAT? Yoi, are you f***ing crazy? You could make
an elephant's head explode with something like 'dis."

     The buzzard was livid. "Yeah, yeah. I'm aware. How much?"

     "Well for a custom job like this I'd have to make some
calls. Add in the corpses you been giving me...I'd say about
30,000 yen. Minimum."

     "Agreed. I need it in two days." I walked out of the store,
for once, leaving the buzzard speechless.

     I walked to a nearby payphone and called Aika. 

     "Yoi! I'm glad you called!"

     I smiled at her voice. "Hey kid. How're your parents doing?"

     "They'll be out in a week. How're you?" She seemed kind of
sad her parents were getting out of the hospital, but I ignored
that for right now.

     "I'm doing okay. Listen, I need some back-up. I'm about to
pull something off, and I'm not quite sure what's going to
happen..."

----------------------

     A few more phone calls and an hour later, H, Itami, and Aika
were setup in an apartment with a window facing my office.
     "If things get bad, Get over there quick. I have a funny
feeling about this." Kyo and Mai were already sitting in my
office. I figured they had been there a few minutes early. It
wasn't them I was afraid of. It was the fact they had a
half-sister they didn't know about that worried me.

     "Will you be alright?" Aika looked at me expectantly.

     I winked right at her. "I'll be fine. What could go wrong?"

     Itami gave me a look that said 'Everything, and a whole lot
more.'
-----------------------

     I sat across from the holy twins, and stared blankly at both
of them. They didn't look happy, but they'd get less happy in a
few minutes, I was sure.

     "Nice Rack, Yoi." Kyo sneered.

     "Nice mustache, Kyo. For a woman." I retorted.

     "If you two are done, why are we here, exactly?" Mai went
straight to the point.

     "You guys, stuff has happened, and I found out you two
aren't the only descendents of Ultra..."

     They looked a bit shocked, but not surprised. I went on.
"You see, I've found out that you guys have-"

     "A sister?" A female voice from behind me spoke.

     "Hello, Yoi. Old chap." Koi...

     Ah, shit. 
                
----------------------------------------

Well, there you have it. My second impro piece. It isn't what I
would've liked, as it was done without prereaders or time. But I
digress, as both of these things were my fault anyway. Hope you
guys enjoy the part!

Email all comment to RDvll@aol.com. No flames, please. I'm new to
this.
